


Diction

by LickleSoxy



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: First Kiss, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-18
Updated: 2015-01-18
Packaged: 2018-03-08 03:46:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3194084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LickleSoxy/pseuds/LickleSoxy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rossi has some vital information on how to seduce one Aaron Hotchner; he feels it necessary to share this information with Morgan.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Diction

"Pay him a compliment."

Morgan stared at his friend in disbelief.

"If he smiles, hit him with another one."

This was not happening.

"Just remember to make it more personal."

This _could not_ be happening.

"You get a blush out of that, you need to take it to the next level."

Seriously, Rossi was _not_ giving him advice on how to pull their boss.

"Hotch doesn't blush." He watched as Rossi raised an eyebrow at the bemused, higher than necessary pitch that escaped his lips.

"Oh yes he does, my friend. You just have to know what to say."

He was dreaming; that had to be the answer. He'd fallen asleep at work, and now his brain was being an ass by conjuring up the most ridiculous scenario it could possibly muster.

"Now, the trick is timing," Rossi said, carrying on the conversation as though it were a perfectly ordinary topic of discussion.

Morgan couldn't help it when curiosity swept its way inside of him. "Timing?"

Rossi nodded. "If he's interested, Morgan, you'll get that blush. But that doesn't guarantee he'll respond."

Intrigued, Morgan licked his lips and leant forwards, his interest undoubtedly plastered across his face. His eye twitched just the tiniest of amounts. Wasn't he supposed to be trying to wake up? This was a dream, wasn't it?

"How do I know he'll respond?"

Rossi smirked. The expression looked positively devilish on the older man's face. His eyes, though squinted slightly, were full of pure amusement, as though he'd been waiting to leak this information for a disastrously long time.

Morgan had to fight the urge to chuckle. He definitely wasn't dreaming - he'd _never_ seen that look on Rossi's face before, and his mind was not mischievous enough to imagine such a thing without having witnessed it beforehand.

"Get all up in his space. Come on to him, strong," Rossi stated; mirth seeped into every word. "And I don't mean flirt like you do with Garcia. He's heard practically every come on you've ever said to her, so it won't do anything."

Morgan tilted his head a tiny amount, indicating that he wanted the older man to elaborate. Rossi didn't disappoint.

"You have to be completely physical with him. Back him up against something, maybe."

Raising an eyebrow, Morgan couldn't quite stop the frown as the words met his ears. Rossi was just messing with him, right? He had to be.

"Then," Rossi continued, tone tremendously naughty, "you make your final move."

If he were being honest, he was kind of scared of his friend right now. If devil horns suddenly sprang up from Rossi's head, he wouldn't be surprised. In fact, Morgan was pretty sure that, any minute now, the older profiler would start cackling madly as he rubbed his hands together in maniacal joy. It was rather disconcerting. Shaking his head to clear that image from his mind, Morgan had to will himself not to turn tail and run.

Rossi looked far too gleeful considering he was divulging his private insight as to what, Morgan assumed, were Hotch's most personal tells. He had to wonder what the guy knew about him, and just who he'd shared the information with. The thought of Rossi knowing his closest secrets made him shudder. It was best not to think about it too much.

Swallowing back the sudden bile in his throat, Morgan blew out a cool breath of air.

"What's my final move?" he asked, and he wasn't sure whether it was dread or anticipation that made his voice catch on the last word.

Rossi leant back in his chair as a startling air of calm settled rapidly on his features. The abrupt change of atmosphere forced a chill down Morgan's spine. He shivered.

"You ask him a question entirely unrelated to what you're actually going for. Maybe ask him about a case, or that upcoming evaluation we're all getting that no one is supposed to know about, but we all do," Rossi commented, shrugging nonchalantly.

Frowning, Morgan huffed in confusion. What would that accomplish? Before he could open his mouth to voice his concern, Rossi raised his hand in a bid to keep him quiet; Morgan complied to the order out of sheer bafflement alone.

"After your little display, ask him something he's not expecting, and he'll do one of two things," Rossi explained, holding a finger up. "Either he'll snap out of it and answer the question, believing you were merely screwing with him. And if he does that, you _back off_ , Derek."

The last part was a warning, and Morgan nodded absently as he got the message, crystal clear. If Hotch settled back into normal conversation and managed to answer coherently, then the professional line would be drawn and he would not be allowed to cross it. Was that the likely outcome of this situation? Would he be able to handle rejection from someone he respected so much?

"And the other thing?" he asked, trying not to dwell too much on it.

Rossi's smirk returned. This time, Morgan couldn't even begin to come up with a description of just how devious it was.

"You get him to stutter, and he's _yours_."

**-o-**


End file.
